If you give a Republican a cookie...

Some motherly advice for Democrats in Congress

When my daughter was in pre-kindergarten, she was targeted by a tiny clique of miniature mean girls who delighted in making her unhappy.

One morning, as we were getting her ready for school, I noticed that she had jammed a couple of her favorite stuffed animals into her backpack. When I asked her why, she whispered: “I thought if I give them my toys, maybe they will like me.”

Tears sprang to my eyes. “Aw honey, that won’t work,” I said, pulling her into a big hug. “Those mean girls will just take your toys and keep on being mean to you.”

Apparently, that’s a life lesson that way too many Democrats in Congress never learned. If they don’t figure it out fast, our country is doomed.

So many terrible things have happened over this past week. But to me, the most dispiriting has been the spectacle of Democrats in Congress voting along with the Republicans in the name of “bipartisanship.”

Consider the Democratic support for the Laken Riley Act, the first bill to pass Congress this year. It was supported by 48 Democrats in the House and 12 in the Senate. Under this Act, any undocumented immigrant who is arrested for a violent crime or for theft – not charged or convicted, just arrested – can be detained and deported without ever seeing the inside of a courtroom.

What does that mean? Here’s one scenario: Maria is an 18-year-old high school senior – an honor student who wants to go to law school to become a guardian ad litem and advocate in court for vulnerable children and seniors. (A local lawyer came to her Government class and talked about it, and she thought it sounded cool.) One day, she’s standing at the cosmetics counter at Target when a giggly pair of teenaged girls sweep through and tuck a few vials of perfume into their pockets. The store’s security guard sees them and rounds them up – grabbing Maria as well. The guard calls the police, and the two other girls (who are U.S. citizens) are cited for shoplifting and sent home. But because Maria’s parents brought her here when she was 2 years old, she is undocumented, and her arrest triggers her deportation. So her mom has to choose between moving back to Mexico with Maria or staying in California with her three younger children. A happy, hard-working, close-knit family is torn apart, perhaps forever. All because a teenaged girl committed the crime of being, literally, an innocent bystander.

The Laken Riley Act clearly violates the Bill of Rights, which states that no one can be deprived of their liberty without “due process of law.” So every Democrat who voted for that bill broke their oath of office, which requires them to support and defend the U.S. Constitution. And for what?

A “pragmatic” Democrat explained to me that the oath-breaking Democrats who voted for the Laken Riley Act were doing what they “had to do” to keep their seats. Most of those Dems faced tight races last November, and they want to make sure they don’t offend voters who say their top issue is halting illegal immigration. By voting yes on Laken Riley, they are trying curry favor with “moderate” Republican voters who say they want bipartisanship in Washington, not gridlock.

But here’s the problem: Bipartisanship is not a good thing in and of itself. When a bill draws bipartisan support, it’s supposed to mean that an idea or an initiative is so clearly a good thing for the nation that it pulls votes from both sides.

Somewhere along the line, Democrats put the bipartisanship cart before the horse. So what we’re seeing now is are Zeno’s bipartisanship – you meet the GOP halfway, and they don’t budge. So you meet them halfway again, and again they don’t budge. And you keep on meeting them halfway, and halfway, and halfway again, until you are one tiny millimeter away from them, and they still haven’t moved an inch. And anyone looking at you standing there, just a hairsbreadth away from the Trump-supporting Republicans, would think that you were on the GOP side.

And they would be right. Because you are.

All those Dems who cravenly supported the Laken Riley Act need to remember this: When voters start hearing heart-wrenching stories about innocent people ensnared by this unconstitutional, unconscionable law, the Republicans who created this mess are going to step back and say (wait for it) – “It’s not our fault. This was a bipartisan effort.”

You cannot compromise or collaborate your way through the Trump Administration’s all-out attack on our rights and our future. They are counting on all you “purple” Dems to ease their way, until they no longer have any need for your assistance. Then they’ll toss you out of your seats, because they know their voters will always prefer a real Republican to a fake one.

There is only one strategy that has a prayer of success – blind, unrelenting opposition. If it comes from the Republican side, you need to respond with a flat NO. You need to make them fight hard for every inch of ground. You’re outnumbered, so you probably won’t win, but you’ll wear them down. And just maybe, your implacable resistance will give heart to the rest of us.

When my daughter came home from kindergarten that day, I sat her on my lap,s and we re-read one of our favorite books, If You Give a Mouse a Cookie. The message of the book is that, if you give a mouse a cookie, he’s going to ask for a glass of milk. (Spoiler alert: By the end of the book, the mouse has pretty much taken over the whole house and is asking for yet another cookie to start the whole process over again.)

So to all the Democrats in Congress who are trying so desperately to appease their way through this nightmare, here’s some motherly advice:

Keep your cookie. Vote your conscience. Save our country.